Mathematical Proof: National Debt Blows Past Uranus

What does the US national debt have in common with Uranus?

According to daily reports released by US Treasury officials, the US national debt has now reached a staggering $18,492,091,120,833.99 (yes they even included the cents). Nearly 18.5 TRILLION dollars.

This is enough dollar bills laid end-to-end to cover the average distance between Earth and Uranus (maths below if you really want to know).

Uranus Debt

 

At the end of October, Republicans and Democrats in Congress agreed they just can’t figure out how to cut the *astronomical* (see what we did there?) spending in the federal budget, leaving tough decisions about today’s fiscal problems for the next Congress and President to deal with.

Such feckless leadership leaves us all impoverished. More interest will be spent on the debt – funds that will buy no national defense, no FBI, not even for a road (because without government, who would build the roads? AMIRITE?). All those funds will go to financing money that has already been spent. This leaves current citizens who aren’t even old enough to vote yet with a huge stack of bills and IOUs. It’s unconscionable; it’s immoral; it’s wrong, in every imaginable sense of the word.

 

As promised, the maths:

Astronomical Unit = 149,597,871 kilometers
Average Distance from Earth to Uranus: 19.2 AU
Distance (in km) from Earth to Uranus: 2,872,279,123 kilometers

Length of One US Dollar Bill: 6.14 inches
Conversion US Dollar Bill to metric (come on, you saw The Martian, in space we translate to metric): 15.5956 centimeters
Conversion US Dollar Bill to metric (kilometers): 0.000155956

National Debt of the US Government: $18,492,091,120,833.99
National Debt of the US Government in $1 dollar bills: (just kidding…)
National Debt of the US Government in Dollar Bills (in kilometers): 2,883,952,562.84 kilometers

2,883,952,562.84 > 2,872,279,123

Conclusion: National Debt of the US Government > Distance from Earth to Uranus

Olympic Update: The Results Are In, And They’re Not Good!

800px-Olympic_Rings.svgWe recently posted that Team USA would need to sweep all 98 medal podiums at Sochi (and 122,000+ more Sochis besides) in order for the IRS to have enough taxable medal winnings to pay off the interest on the federal government’s debt in 2014 alone.

Unfortunately, Team USA did not win gold, silver, and bronze in all 98 events. Accordingly, we will have to revise our projections.

Team USA won 9 gold medals, 7 silver, and 12 bronze medals. This will give the IRS the opportunity to leech a mere $178,200 in tax revenue, a downward revision from $1,940,400.

This unfortunately means that the IRS will have to wait for more than 1.3 MILLION Sochis (which will take 5.3 million years!) in order to collect the revenue needed to pay off only one year of interest on the federal government’s debt today.

Are we being ridiculous? Of course we are! The US was never going to win all medals at all 98 events at the Winter Games.  But then again we’re no more ridiculous than the federal government’s politicians who continue to irresponsibly enact unrealistic budgets that spend far more than is collected in revenue and far more than is the constitutional mission of the federal government.

Go Team USA, Your Government Needs Your Prize Money!

800px-Olympic_Rings.svgThe 2014 Olympic Winter Games are underway in Sochi!

Team USA Olympians are engaging in their quadrennial quest for winter gold, and, if they’re successful, they’ll pay for it. Each medal comes with a cash prize of $25,000 for gold, $15,000 for silver, and $10,000 for bronze (per medal) paid by the US Olympic Committee to the event winner.

And the IRS is already salivating at the opportunity to stick Team USA with tax bills on their winnings.  At the highest tax bracket, Americans for Tax Reform estimates an approximate $9,900 tax bill for each gold medal, $5,940 for a silver, and $3,960 for each bronze medal.

But let’s take it a step further.

There are 98 events at the Winter Games this time around.  If Team USA were to sweep the medal podiums and win every single medal available (gold, silver, AND bronze) in every single event, the IRS would need more than 122,000 Sochi Winter Games (at 98 events each!) just to pay the interest on the federal government’s debt, for this year alone!

Despite having imposed math mandates on states, it’s clear yet again from this example that federal government elected officials utterly fail to comprehend even the most basic math.

So ski, snowboard, skate, shoot, and curl hard Team USA. Your government needs you!